ALL THOUGHTS OF SLEEP DESERT ME

Tuesday 13 November 2007

It’s 0710 and I’m feeling a bit down. I shouldn’t be tired as I actually went to bed before 11, for a change. I watched Mastermind (taped) and then the GLW watched “America’s Next Top Model”, which I abhor. After some aimless pottering in the study I called it a night. A coffee, some porridge and an anti-depressant should kick me into life.

I got a good e-mail from my ex-colleague (I would like to think of her as a friend) Victoria, who’s shacked up in Cyprus with her Greek God Zeus*. It was such a good e-mail; full of humour and interesting stuff; that I’m waiting for the right time to reply so I can do it justice. Victoria was a joy to work with and if I had a Fantasy Office (like Fantasy Football – nae kinky stuff) she’d definitely be in the team. That makes me think about whom else I’d have in the team from all the places I’ve worked. (* I may have made his name up purely for comedic effect).

I’d have Jane, who I worked with at the prison, Gaz and Joe, who work here (well, not HERE but for this employer), Anne Marie from SSHA/Scottish Homes/Key and Karen and Veronica from the Galleries. I’ve probably worked with other great people, whose names have been lost over the years, but these are the ones I’d work with again. Of course, I’d probably be the least competent of them all but as it’s my office I’d only be there for entertainment value and to do the quizzes and organise the nights out. Dream on Paul, dream on.

I’m getting a bit nervous about the quiz night on Friday, especially because I’m using my own portable PA, which I’ve never used in public before. I’m going to test it in the house tonight and make sure, for the umpteenth time, that the audio round plays okay.

Current favourite tunes:
The Stones Roses – Mersey Paradise
Babybird – Goodnight
Field Mice – Sensitive
Chin Chin – Stop! Your Crying
Art Brut – We Formed A Band
The Barracudas – We’re Living in Violent Times
Superstar – Every Day I Fall Apart
Radiohead – The Headmaster Ritual (webcast)
The Orchids – Last Thing On My Mind
Close Lobsters – I’m Going To Heaven To See If It Rains

WORK IS A FOUR-LETTER WORD

Wednesday 14 November 2007

Phil, my close neighbour and occasional bus partner, sent me this e-mail this morning:

“My morning so far:

06:05 D7 Bus turns up five minutes late. I mention to the driver that he is supposed to be at Tesco at 6:00am so that he can link in with the 6:15am X57 from Ferrytoll in to Edinburgh.

06:06 Driver looks at me and mutters. Both my wife and I are now cursed for the rest of our lives.

06:06 - 06:12 Driver drives like a banshee through Rosyth hitting every speed bump at about 30mph and the passengers of the bus are bouncing about and suffering minor brain injuries.

06:13 Back axle on the bus breaks just outside Rosyth.

06:14 Driver continues on even though the wheels on the bus are no longer going 'round and round.'

06:14 Bad smell of burning and horrible scraping and screeching noises coming from the back of the bus.

06:15 Bus eventually sheds it's mortal coil and stops.

06:16 The X57 is stuck behind the now deceased D7

06:17 My fellow passengers (including the extra from Lord of the Rings) and I run at full pelt for a couple of minutes to get to the Ferrytoll.

06:22 The X57 has had to do a U-turn and head back up the road and go via Inverkeithing in order to get to the Ferrytoll.

06:25 After successfully getting a seat that isn't next to a fat person I depart to Edinburgh on the X57.

06:45 Arrive at my desk and wonder whether it is all worth it?

07:20 News report on the radio that a bus is blocking one of the roads leading to the Ferrytoll and Forth Road Bridge.

In summary:

F**k me!”

Says it all about Stagecoach. I share his pain, while pissing myself laughing!

Last night I watched the Five programme about the Jonestown Massacre of 1978 and I found it less sensationalised than some of Five’s other factual programmes and documentaries. There were interviews with the few survivors and I found it enthralling. Less so the latest edition of Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares, which was a rehash/revisit of a previous show with only 10 minutes of new stuff. Very disappointing.

Went to bed feeling rather deflated. More and more I’m giving up on my dream of getting a job in a more creative environment, i.e. something in the media or broadcasting. I’m destined to rot away in a “good job” that pays a pittance and pushes me even less. Just shoot me now.

Got an e-mail from Dave, with whom I run the Jock ‘n’ Roll website, about the book idea. Since we started the site we’ve been looking a doing a book in connection with it. Dave’s been keener on the idea than I have but only because I feel there might not be a market. But I’m coming round to the idea and if we don’t try it we’ll never know where it might take us. This could well be the route to ‘where I want to go’. I’ve even come up with an idea for a companion book.

Dave’s got some free tickets for a gig by Will Hodgkinson, guitar neophyte extraordinaire (nope, I don't know what it means either). I never read any of his books but they’re now on my Christmas list and I’ve added a link to his website and Guardian column (see left). (Talking of which, I’ve added a few more links for websites, blogs and MySpaces for bands and people I like, nay, love - Hi Giselle and The Orchids).

The Orchids, who came out of retirement last year, have another Glasgow gig scheduled in for Wednesday 28th November at The Cottier Theatre. I do love them but the gig is on a Wednesday night in Glasgow, the same night Celtic play Shakatak in the Champions League. I’ll see if Dave fancies a mini ‘road trip’. The last time I was at the Cottier was to see the BMX Bandits over ten years ago. In fact, I think I was still in the Navy then. They played a fabulous pre-show tape and I wrote to them asking for a copy. That’s when I heard Annette Funicello for the first time. I then downloaded everything I could find by her, including the fabulously apposite “Tall Paul”.

The guitar has arrived at work from the SAHM. It’s a white Stagg number and has been signed by loads of Scottish bands, like Mogwai, Pop Up and The Passengers. Technically it’s a Stagg L400 LP and retails for around £150. A nice wee prize. Hell, I mean even learn how to play the thing. Or, if I don't Flick will. I get her into a Girl Gargae band yet.

Flick’s no well so I’ve left work at lunchtime amd it's home for soup, cuddles and cartoons, which actually means that we’ll both be asleep on the settee twenty minutes into "101 Dalmatians" and definitely by the time the GLW comes home!